Does tomorrow really have to be Monday?? I have had a string of really great weekends this term (despite how annoying and less than fun many of the weeks have been). Lots of diving coupled with some solid studying and this weekend was no exception!
Yesterday afternoon I visited Flamingo Bay for a nice dive. I've marked down as having been there before but it didn't look familiar to me. What a beautiful reef! The corals there are exquisite and it is full of life. So many Christmas tree worms and shrimp! The thermoclines in the area were pretty impressive - we enter a couple of pretty chilly locations! Okay, I say chilly but my computer was reading 85 degrees, so maybe I'm just that much of a wimp. I'm not convinced though, because it was ready 86 degrees most of the time and it certainly didn't feel like it just got one degree colder. It said the same stuff today; I am skeptical! We snorkeled at the sculpture park for a little while afterwards and I did a little bit of free diving to get some pictures of the statues.
This morning I went back up to the Marine Protected Area to dive Flamingo Bay and then the sculpture park/Buccaneer wreck/grand mal wall. This is such a beautiful part of Grenada, I am so glad we have protections in place to help keep it that way. During my dives I found a kite, some fishing line and a hook, a large rusty nail, a KFC cup, and a beaded necklace. Not exactly the kind of things you want to see on such beautiful reefs! Makes me think of turtles accidentally ingesting stuff and dying (but they certainly aren't the only ones that accidentally eat rubbish lying around under water). Luckily my BCD has nice big pockets so I collected the stuff for later land disposal. Yay for doing good deeds :) Kind of hard to turn it down though when you're diving with a company with the word "eco" in the name!
Both dives were gorgeous overall and my air consumption was better than the dive master with us : D. I enjoyed rubbing it in his face a little! That's what he gets for forgetting my name! I dropped 2lbs off my weight belt this weekend. I had kind of forgotten that I was going to need to re-evaluate the amount of weight I carry after a couple of weeks of school (combination of getting used to diving again and losing weight because I never eat here - I am so tired of eating the same things!!). Last week when I did a dive I paid attention to how much air I needed to add to my BCD on the bottom to achieve neutral buoyancy (it was a lot) and then how much I dumped throughout the dive (very little). Both a sure signs you are over weighted! Regardless, I feel much better diving with 2lbs fewer. It's amazing what a difference it can make! I don't feel as much drag and I definitely think it helped contribute to my excellent air consumption. It's a pretty great dive when you're down for 50 minutes and only breathe half a tank! Part of that's being female (smaller lungs), but a lot of it has to do with controlling breathing well and not over exerting yourself (in other words being lazy).
I've been diving so much lately that I'm actually starting to develop blisters and ulcers on my ankles from my fins! The first one hurt a lot when it started, but now I barely notice it. Is that a bad sign? I have this large ulcer on my ankle that I don't notice when it rubs?? Poor nerves haha. Guess we'll see if it heals some over midterms! It's amazing to me just how fragile skin becomes when it is soaking wet and supersaturated. This is largely what contributes to all the scrapes and cuts I come back with after being on the dive boat! That thing is dangerous! No not really, these are always really minor little wounds.
I think my next task to "conquer" will be my mask issues. I really love the ocean, and I long for the ability to just jump into water without worry. I haven't really jumped into any body of water since I was little, it's just too risky. Just thinking about flooding my mask makes me feel panicky. My heart rate elevates, my breathing becomes irregular, and this is all just me thinking about the task! I kind of doubt I'll ever like getting my face wet, but I'd at least like to be a little less afraid of it. After I first got certified, I spent my whole dives thinking about 2 things: breathing evenly and slowly, and making sure my face was protected at all times. I focus mainly on breathing these days, but you'd better believe that I'm conscientious about where my mask is when I roll into the water and when there are people around me. Can't have anyone accidentally kicking it off my face! It really scares me to wonder how I'd react to that. I had a small leak in the seal against my face yesterday and as I tinkered with the placement I had to remind myself over and over to breathe and that it was just water!! Not cool! The sneaky thing is, I've set a small list of required "steps" that must be in place in order for me to practice. Only at the end of a dive, only if Christie is present, only if the dive conditions are good enough. Not an extensive list, but it does have to be 100% and so far since I've been thinking about practicing this skill (4 dives), those three things haven't been met. Oh darn!
In addition to all of this diving, I did plenty of studying this weekend. I made some good progress on diagnostic imaging and large animal surgery, two of my "harder" courses. My first exam is this Friday - theriogenology. No one really knows what the heck is going to be on that exam. We know to studying the first visiting professor's notes and the current visiting professors notes, but what the heck did he cover in his 4 lectures?? Not a clue (and yes I was there in class for all of them). I think I'd have a better chance of understanding his material if it was written backwards in German.
I also made some delicious and long overdue zucchini bread this weekend too. Grenada being Grenada (and not very reliable in the grocery department), I decided to plan for three different types of bread and hoped that I'd be able to get all the ingredients for one. In order of my interest, I chose zucchini bread, banana bread, and pumpkin bread. Lucky for me, they actually had all the ingredients, but I was pretty set on zucchini bread so I stuck with my original plan. I really had no idea whether I could get zucchini in Grenada (I'm pretty excited they sell it here!). I recognized the zucchini before reading the label - they call it green squash (zucchini) here. As I was buying the ingredients, I decided hey why not make a double batch and share lots! As it turns out, I am not the only zucchini bread lover and my neighbors and friends enjoyed the benefits of my baking. I was a little bit surprised by how many people had heard of zucchini bread before and like it. I really had no idea it was so popular! In my sharing though, I did manage to find one person who had never heard of it before (turns out she likes it a lot haha). The only weird thing that happened with a couple of the loaves was that the very bottom was a little bit gelatinous and tasted like buttered eggs. I think some of the egg settled out while I was filling all the pans causing it to cook slightly funny! Lesson learned!
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Just Keep Swimming
Tomorrow I perform my first surgery for our junior surgery and anesthesia laboratory. So far I've managed anesthesia and assisted with the castration, but now it's my turn to be in charge of the castration. I don't really know how I feel about this. I'm not overly nervous per say, but I'm not super excited like a lot of my classmates are. Probably a good thing - keep the circulating catecholamines low and my brain will perform better.
I've been working on my suturing skills the last couple of days. I feel pretty confident that I can perform them well, but will I be able to perform them flawlessly? My patient's life depends on it. Hopefully I don't make any slip knots. I've been working on those for awhile now. At least I'm aware that I have a tendency to make them. Incising through layers of tissue is more complicated than it may sound. It's not a simple as making a single cut. It's all about applying the right amount of pressure, slipping delicately through one layer at a time, trying to be as atraumatic as possible. You want to be as efficient as possible knowing that time under anesthesia is increased risk for the patient as well. So many things to think about with a live patient!
I completed my 30th dive this morning! That's 30 dives in just over 6 months (March 16-September 25). I'm pretty excited! I've completed certifications in Open Water for recreational diving, Advanced Open Water, and Underwater Photography, and am in the process of completing a Nitrox course. What's next after this? I'm not sure! I've started to realize that this is something that is really important to me and that I really want to find a way to combine my professional veterinary goals with my diving goals. Perhaps some day I will teach people to dive? Who knows where diving will take me, but I plan to keep it in my life as much as possible. I never expected to like it this much!
I've been working on my suturing skills the last couple of days. I feel pretty confident that I can perform them well, but will I be able to perform them flawlessly? My patient's life depends on it. Hopefully I don't make any slip knots. I've been working on those for awhile now. At least I'm aware that I have a tendency to make them. Incising through layers of tissue is more complicated than it may sound. It's not a simple as making a single cut. It's all about applying the right amount of pressure, slipping delicately through one layer at a time, trying to be as atraumatic as possible. You want to be as efficient as possible knowing that time under anesthesia is increased risk for the patient as well. So many things to think about with a live patient!
I completed my 30th dive this morning! That's 30 dives in just over 6 months (March 16-September 25). I'm pretty excited! I've completed certifications in Open Water for recreational diving, Advanced Open Water, and Underwater Photography, and am in the process of completing a Nitrox course. What's next after this? I'm not sure! I've started to realize that this is something that is really important to me and that I really want to find a way to combine my professional veterinary goals with my diving goals. Perhaps some day I will teach people to dive? Who knows where diving will take me, but I plan to keep it in my life as much as possible. I never expected to like it this much!
Monday, September 23, 2013
Monday Musings
The stress of this semester is slowly but surely beginning to dig away at my resolve. I've taken on a lot of responsibility this term and the coursework is more challenging in new ways. I'm really tired but not in a sleepy kind of way. I feel behind, pressed for time, guilty because my dog is being neglected (even though she's really living a good life!), and I just want my sanity back.
Most of my classmates are loving junior surgery lab but I see it as something that is eating up so much of my days. There is so much involved outside of class time between rounds, patient care, and paperwork. This is so silly because I know that this is what the rest of my life is going to be, but somehow it seems more strenuous because grades are involved. Not only for the class but also for all of my other classes that I'm responsible for. I'm weird and I actually enjoy filling out the paperwork (I think it has to do with my neat and orderly tendencies) I just hate feeling like it's taking away from something else.
I'm trying so hard to focus on the long term goals. Clinics, graduation, internship, residency. That's what I'm here for, I know that's what I want. It's a really long road ahead and I'm not sure how all the puzzle pieces are going to fall into place. There's so much I want from life and yet the time and resources seem so finite. I don't know. And I think that's what's so hard for me. I'm a planner. I make lists and write out the fine print and am super detail oriented. I like details and order. I like routine and things that are comfortable, and I have a lot of unknowns and variables to juggle at this point.
I wish I could say that I believed myself when I say stuff like tomorrow I'll wake up and feel better about everything, but I think this is going to be an internal struggle that goes on for awhile, I just need to accept it and let it be. I know it will all work out in the end because I live my life in search of happiness.
Most of my classmates are loving junior surgery lab but I see it as something that is eating up so much of my days. There is so much involved outside of class time between rounds, patient care, and paperwork. This is so silly because I know that this is what the rest of my life is going to be, but somehow it seems more strenuous because grades are involved. Not only for the class but also for all of my other classes that I'm responsible for. I'm weird and I actually enjoy filling out the paperwork (I think it has to do with my neat and orderly tendencies) I just hate feeling like it's taking away from something else.
I'm trying so hard to focus on the long term goals. Clinics, graduation, internship, residency. That's what I'm here for, I know that's what I want. It's a really long road ahead and I'm not sure how all the puzzle pieces are going to fall into place. There's so much I want from life and yet the time and resources seem so finite. I don't know. And I think that's what's so hard for me. I'm a planner. I make lists and write out the fine print and am super detail oriented. I like details and order. I like routine and things that are comfortable, and I have a lot of unknowns and variables to juggle at this point.
I wish I could say that I believed myself when I say stuff like tomorrow I'll wake up and feel better about everything, but I think this is going to be an internal struggle that goes on for awhile, I just need to accept it and let it be. I know it will all work out in the end because I live my life in search of happiness.
Sunday, September 22, 2013
Per Rectum
It's basically a right of passage. The activity that turns you from vet student to Vet Student. The activity that all pre-clinical students must endure and then make up findings during clinics. What on earth am I talking about? Rectal palpations of the cow, of course. Grossed out yet? Horrified for the poor cow (and student)? Trying to figure out exactly how that works?
Here's the deal - before you go calling the humane society and your local PETA activists, this is what you must know. Rectal palpation of the cow is a completely normal, routine medical procedure that 99% of cows go through multiple times during their life span. It allows us to determine pregnancy and infertility, as well as disease of the reproductive tract. If you're wondering why we go in the rectum instead of the "other," ahem, hole, well you just stop and think about which sounds more uncomfortable. Also, if you stick your hand in the pregnant tract, you're going to find a closed cervix, end of story. That doesn't tell you much. You only know that the tract has closed itself off for some reason but not if there is disease, if the cow is a couple months pregnant, or maybe she's ready to pop!
So yes, with a giant plastic sleeve covering from finger tips to shoulder, we put copious amounts of medical lubricant on our hands and gently work our way in. The cow shifts around in annoyance initially, then settles in to just squeezing the heck out of your arm while your inside. You have to make sure all the feces are out of the way our else you'll just be feeling that instead of the smooth lining of rectal and colonic mucosa. As you feel that mucosa, you're feeling for lumps in the reproductive tract (such as the cervix or the ovaries) which lie directly below the terminal GI tract. It's not overly difficult, but as a new student, you're sliding your hand around in there thinking "what the heck, I feel nothing and this is gross." One of my classmates has done thousands of palpations and was super happy and excited for this lab. He's been waiting years for this! He was showing off and diagnosing pregnant cows like crazy. I was very happy for him, but I did not share his enthusiasm. We have quite a few pictures from the group of all our disgusted faces. It's gross. There is nothing pretty about dealing with the back side of farm animals, period. There's a lot of fecal matter and urine flying everywhere, and I was so grateful to have my protective coveralls on. I managed to stay pretty darn clean, but most of my classmates weren't so fortunate. I think the best part of my day was coming home for that cleansing shower!!
Here's the deal - before you go calling the humane society and your local PETA activists, this is what you must know. Rectal palpation of the cow is a completely normal, routine medical procedure that 99% of cows go through multiple times during their life span. It allows us to determine pregnancy and infertility, as well as disease of the reproductive tract. If you're wondering why we go in the rectum instead of the "other," ahem, hole, well you just stop and think about which sounds more uncomfortable. Also, if you stick your hand in the pregnant tract, you're going to find a closed cervix, end of story. That doesn't tell you much. You only know that the tract has closed itself off for some reason but not if there is disease, if the cow is a couple months pregnant, or maybe she's ready to pop!
So yes, with a giant plastic sleeve covering from finger tips to shoulder, we put copious amounts of medical lubricant on our hands and gently work our way in. The cow shifts around in annoyance initially, then settles in to just squeezing the heck out of your arm while your inside. You have to make sure all the feces are out of the way our else you'll just be feeling that instead of the smooth lining of rectal and colonic mucosa. As you feel that mucosa, you're feeling for lumps in the reproductive tract (such as the cervix or the ovaries) which lie directly below the terminal GI tract. It's not overly difficult, but as a new student, you're sliding your hand around in there thinking "what the heck, I feel nothing and this is gross." One of my classmates has done thousands of palpations and was super happy and excited for this lab. He's been waiting years for this! He was showing off and diagnosing pregnant cows like crazy. I was very happy for him, but I did not share his enthusiasm. We have quite a few pictures from the group of all our disgusted faces. It's gross. There is nothing pretty about dealing with the back side of farm animals, period. There's a lot of fecal matter and urine flying everywhere, and I was so grateful to have my protective coveralls on. I managed to stay pretty darn clean, but most of my classmates weren't so fortunate. I think the best part of my day was coming home for that cleansing shower!!
Another Week Down
Well, we are officially 1/3rd of the way through classes now. We just finished week 5 of 17, with two of those 17 weeks being exam only weeks. I must say, I'm really not overly fond of 3rd year so far. I constantly feel tired and behind and extra stupid. Vet school in generally has a habit of making you feel dumb all the time, but I think as long as you can accept that, it's healthy. Sounds crazy? Here's the thing - it is impossible to know everything about every little detail. That's why veterinarians don't really practice medicine on all species nowadays. Unfortunately, in school we are indeed expected to know everything about everything which makes things a little bit frustrating.
I feel like really only have a good understanding and handle on two of my five classes. Small animal medicine (my favorite) and small animal surgery come fairly easy to me. Large animal surgery isn't difficult in the sense that the material is tough, but I have no experience with horses and large animals and so it makes it much more difficult truly understand what's going on and keep the 1.8 million things that can go wrong in the horse straight! I doubt I will ever have a good handle on theriogenology. That class is a total mess and disaster. It is disgusting that the university is allowing this sort of situation to happen and continue. This man has no business teaching and instead needs to be receiving the appropriate medical help - both of which aren't happening. Thankfully we have a visiting professor starting this week so I can at least go through this week perhaps understanding what's going on. I am so tired, angry, and anxious about not understanding anything in this class. Not only is it a 4 credit class, but this is information I need to know for clinics and my national licensing exam! GAHHH! Lastly we have diagnostic imagining. In all fairness and honesty, I haven't done much true sit-down-and-figure-it-all-out studying for this class yet, so perhaps when I do that I will feel more confident, but for now it's all just shadows and imaginary things! I actually feel like I have a decent base for radiology thanks to my time in undergrad spent hanging out with boarded radiologists, it's really more just putting the technical words to the things I see.
Our other two classes that I don't count because they don't require in-class time are clinical practice and junior surgery lab. We only have 4 rotations for the former so that's not so bad (our second is coming up in a week) and then junior surgery is once every week and a half or so. I'm up next for being surgeon for our 3rd and final castration. Yikes, poor dog! The only thing I really don't like about that class is how time consuming it is. There's a lot of out-of-class time involved and when I'm already short on time to give, it just adds to the neglect of everything else, most notably Lucy. I'm sure she could make a mile long list of her complaints and grievances this term! Actually probably not - she's a happy-go-lucky dog, but I'm sure she would appreciate a little bit more attention!
So that's where I'm at academically these days. Long weeks, lots of studying, quite a bit of confusion, and sometimes not nearly enough sleep (although I certainly do try!).
I feel like really only have a good understanding and handle on two of my five classes. Small animal medicine (my favorite) and small animal surgery come fairly easy to me. Large animal surgery isn't difficult in the sense that the material is tough, but I have no experience with horses and large animals and so it makes it much more difficult truly understand what's going on and keep the 1.8 million things that can go wrong in the horse straight! I doubt I will ever have a good handle on theriogenology. That class is a total mess and disaster. It is disgusting that the university is allowing this sort of situation to happen and continue. This man has no business teaching and instead needs to be receiving the appropriate medical help - both of which aren't happening. Thankfully we have a visiting professor starting this week so I can at least go through this week perhaps understanding what's going on. I am so tired, angry, and anxious about not understanding anything in this class. Not only is it a 4 credit class, but this is information I need to know for clinics and my national licensing exam! GAHHH! Lastly we have diagnostic imagining. In all fairness and honesty, I haven't done much true sit-down-and-figure-it-all-out studying for this class yet, so perhaps when I do that I will feel more confident, but for now it's all just shadows and imaginary things! I actually feel like I have a decent base for radiology thanks to my time in undergrad spent hanging out with boarded radiologists, it's really more just putting the technical words to the things I see.
Our other two classes that I don't count because they don't require in-class time are clinical practice and junior surgery lab. We only have 4 rotations for the former so that's not so bad (our second is coming up in a week) and then junior surgery is once every week and a half or so. I'm up next for being surgeon for our 3rd and final castration. Yikes, poor dog! The only thing I really don't like about that class is how time consuming it is. There's a lot of out-of-class time involved and when I'm already short on time to give, it just adds to the neglect of everything else, most notably Lucy. I'm sure she could make a mile long list of her complaints and grievances this term! Actually probably not - she's a happy-go-lucky dog, but I'm sure she would appreciate a little bit more attention!
So that's where I'm at academically these days. Long weeks, lots of studying, quite a bit of confusion, and sometimes not nearly enough sleep (although I certainly do try!).
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Shakem At Night
Blah, I know I have been terrible at posting, life got really hectic after the first week of school. They were sneaky and eased us into it and then BAM we had a thousand things to do. I'm working on a recap of the last couple of weeks because a lot has happened, but until then I just wanted to rave about the quick night dive I did tonight.
I'm pretty sure my roommate thinks I'm crazy for even thinking about a dive the night before an exam, but it was really therapeutic. Just what I needed. My life is so hectic and stressful these days and there is just nothing like having a little bit of time to yourself where your two main focuses are steady, even, rhythmic breathing and maintaining effortless buoyancy under water. It is so soothing, so calming to be in tune with such basic physiologic needs and it just tends to make everything else melt away. Sure, seeing critters is a major added bonus, but honestly you could drop me in the water and tell me to hang out at 30ft for as long as I could and I'd be content. It truly is why so many relaxation techniques are centered around breathing!
This was a really quick dive because the wreck we visited was at 100ft. You just can't go that deep for very long without adding complications like running out of air and decompression time. I'm not really interested in either. We did have one person come up nearly empty from the dive, but I suppose that's what you get when you ignore your gauges and get excited where the density is 3x what it is at the surface (meaning you go through air much faster). I checked my gauges at least 4 times that I can think of and that was just in the 20ish minutes that I was on the bottom and I don't go through air very fast. A combination of relaxation, mild movements, good breathing techniques, and physiologically and anatomically being female allow me to go through a tank much more slowly. We ended up staying down just shy of 30 minutes and with studying to do tonight, it was better that this wasn't a 70+ minute dive (although I'd much rather stay super shallow and be underwater longer!). The wreck was pretty at night, the colors and critters were more beautiful as always, and I enjoyed slowly focusing on one thing at a time. My buddy stayed right with me and we did great!
Now to face my large animal surgery exam tomorrow, our 2nd castration for junior surgery lab on Tuesday, and a make up small animal surgery exam on Wednesday. Busy busy!
I'm pretty sure my roommate thinks I'm crazy for even thinking about a dive the night before an exam, but it was really therapeutic. Just what I needed. My life is so hectic and stressful these days and there is just nothing like having a little bit of time to yourself where your two main focuses are steady, even, rhythmic breathing and maintaining effortless buoyancy under water. It is so soothing, so calming to be in tune with such basic physiologic needs and it just tends to make everything else melt away. Sure, seeing critters is a major added bonus, but honestly you could drop me in the water and tell me to hang out at 30ft for as long as I could and I'd be content. It truly is why so many relaxation techniques are centered around breathing!
This was a really quick dive because the wreck we visited was at 100ft. You just can't go that deep for very long without adding complications like running out of air and decompression time. I'm not really interested in either. We did have one person come up nearly empty from the dive, but I suppose that's what you get when you ignore your gauges and get excited where the density is 3x what it is at the surface (meaning you go through air much faster). I checked my gauges at least 4 times that I can think of and that was just in the 20ish minutes that I was on the bottom and I don't go through air very fast. A combination of relaxation, mild movements, good breathing techniques, and physiologically and anatomically being female allow me to go through a tank much more slowly. We ended up staying down just shy of 30 minutes and with studying to do tonight, it was better that this wasn't a 70+ minute dive (although I'd much rather stay super shallow and be underwater longer!). The wreck was pretty at night, the colors and critters were more beautiful as always, and I enjoyed slowly focusing on one thing at a time. My buddy stayed right with me and we did great!
Now to face my large animal surgery exam tomorrow, our 2nd castration for junior surgery lab on Tuesday, and a make up small animal surgery exam on Wednesday. Busy busy!
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