Special Needs

Lucy is a dog. She is my dog. We haven't known each other all that long - just over 2 months. But since I brought Lucy into my life, I have learned that she is not an ordinary dog.

Lucy is a special needs dog. She needs the humans in her life to understand that she is extra anxious, that her anxiety triggers are low threshold. She needs her family to understand that she has not always lived with them, that she spent 5.5 years as someone else's dog, and was subjected to a different lifestyle. Was she abused at some point in her life? Unfortunately she can't tell me. Where was she born? What happened to her during the first 6 months of her life? How about the time span she spent with her previous owner? While she was in foster care? Her being an animal and me a human, I am not privy to the words she might speak if she could. I can only guess what tales she'd tell.

For instance, at some point in her life, she decided men were not to be trusted. She certainly could have been on the receiving end of abuse, but it could also be that she just didn't interact with men very much while she was young and so now she is sensitized to their presence. She seems to be more fearful of some men than others, but she has a generalized fear of all men no matter the shape, size, age, or color.

If Lucy could talk instead of bark and growl, I think what she'd say is this: when you move suddenly, it startles me. When you raise your voice, even if it's not at me, it scares me. When you pretend like you are being scary, you are actually be scary to me because my first thought is that you are actually going to hurt me. When you make quick jerky movements, I feel threatened because I can't predict what you are going to do next, and therefore worry that you are going to injure me. When you tower over me, I feel very small and helpless. General life makes me feel vulnerable, but because I can't talk and ask you not to do something, I have to bark and growl at you because it is my only way of saying that I don't like something. I don't want to hurt you, that scares me even more! I just want you to realize that what you're doing at the moment has made me feel upset. I can't help it. Anxiety is more than an emotional problem, it is a chemical and physical problem too. I want to be happy-go-lucky just like the lab up the street - I just can't. Maybe it's because I overproduce certain hormones or maybe it's because I don't produce enough. Maybe it's because something(s) happened to me in life that taught me that life is really scary and harmful things are lurking everywhere. Please try to understand. I really do want to be your friend!

My dog needs my patience. She needs my understanding, my time, and my unconditional love. Sometimes the first three are hard to have all the time, but I know that she really loves and needs me just as I love and need her. We need to work together to help her find balance and relief from her anxiety.